Unmasking PDA Series: Part 3: Studying on Your Terms - University Life as a PDAer

12 May

University can be an exciting but overwhelming experience for students with a Pathological Demand Avoidant (PDA) profile. The structure, deadlines, and constant expectations can activate avoidance, anxiety, overwhelm and accumulate into Autistic burnout and disengagement from university studies. The dropout rate for Autistic university students is significantly higher than that of their non-Autistic peers. Estimates vary, but research suggests that 40–80% of autistic students do not complete their degrees, compared to around 25% of the general student population. I presume that for PDAers incompletion rates are even greater.

However, with the right strategies, accommodations and supports in place, university can be a more achievable, and at times enjoyable, experience. Having co-founded the Curtin (University) Specialist Mentoring Program in 2013 with my lovely colleague, Dr Jasmine McDonald, drawing upon my own experience, and concurrently supporting my own neurodivergent/ PDA children through university, I have identified common barriers to engagement, as well as accumulated strategies and supports that might assist.

Key Barriers

Demand Avoidance and Academic Expectations

Difficulty starting or completing coursework due to the pressure of demands (even self-imposed ones).
Struggles with deadlines, attendance requirements, and structured learning formats feeling demanding.
Increased anxiety when faced with rigid schedules or mandatory participation.
Perfectionistic tendencies interfering with submitting coursework.

Executive Function Challenges

Issues with planning, organisation, and task initiation.
Difficulty managing long-term assignments and prioritising tasks.
Time blindness – difficulty perceiving, estimating, and managing time effectively.
Procrastination or avoidance spirals due to stress and perceived pressure.

Sensory and Environmental Stressors

Unfamiliar environment, unplanned changes to lecture or tutorial location.
Overwhelming lecture theatres, bright lights, or noisy communal spaces.
Unpredictability in daily routines, leading to heightened anxiety.
Difficulty accessing quiet or low-demand study environments.

Social and Communication Barriers

Struggles with group work, networking, or unspoken social expectations.
Difficulty advocating for accommodations due to challenges with initiating emails/ approaching lecturer and a lack of trust in authority figures being able or willing to meet needs.
Masking exhaustion from trying to fit into a non-Autistic university culture.
Feeling isolated from peers due to social communication differences.

Mental Health and Well-being

High rates of anxiety, depression, burnout, and withdrawal/ shutdowns.
Emotional dysregulation when faced with pressure or perceived failure.
Lack of understanding from university staff about how PDA presents in adults.

Institutional Rigidity

Universities often require self-advocacy to access support, which can be challenging for PDAers to initiate.
Limited flexibility in deadlines, attendance policies, and coursework formats.
Bureaucratic processes (e.g., applying for accommodations) can feel overwhelming and inaccessible.

What might help?

Structuring University to Work with Your PDA Brain

Graduated Transition – Many students assume they need to enrol in four units per semester because that’s how the course is structured. However, I often encourage students to begin with a lighter load—such as one, two, or three units—during their transition year, and only increase when they feel ready. It's important to normalise that not all students take four units at once, and to highlight that taking fewer units can lead to better academic performance, improved wellbeing, and more time for meaningful extracurricular or life activities.

Self-Paced and Online Courses – When available, self-paced or online options can offer greater flexibility and control over when and how you complete your coursework. However, it's important to consider your own learning style—some students (me included!) find it easy to fall behind or disengage with pre-recorded content and may benefit more from attending classes in person for structure and accountability.
Spaced-Out Deadlines – Where possible, aim to stagger your assessments to reduce pressure and avoid last-minute overwhelm. Some universities offer flexible or negotiable deadlines, so it’s worth exploring options for spreading out your workload in a way that supports your focus and wellbeing.
Alternative Assessment Methods – If exams are difficult due to pressure and avoidance, find out if your university offers oral or recorded presentations, take-home exams, or coursework alternatives. Often, you can organise a separate room on campus to complete your exam.
Use Scripts for Communication – Emails to lecturers can feel overwhelming. Draft reusable templates for common requests (e.g., asking for clarification, requesting deadline extensions) or have someone else write emails for you.

Doing the Work

Flexible Study Plans – Instead of strict schedules, try a "menu" approach where you list tasks for the day but choose what to tackle in the moment.

Work in Short Bursts – Long study sessions can feel overwhelming. Try the Pomodoro Technique (25-minute focus, 5-minute break) or even shorter bursts to ease demand resistance.
Use Calendar Systems – Digital or physical planners with color-coded deadlines and recurring reminders can make time feel more tangible.
Set 'False' Deadlines – Build in buffer time before actual due dates to allow for delays.
Create Transition Cues – Use music, environmental changes (e.g., moving locations), or physical activities to signal shifts between tasks.
Task Reframing – Instead of “I have to write this essay,” try “I choose to explore this topic.” Shifting your mindset may reduce the sense of external pressure.
Body Doubling – Studying with a friend (even virtually) can make tasks feel less demanding. Silent Zoom study sessions or library meetups can help.
Peer Mentor – Having a peer mentor you meet up with weekly (yes, some universities provide this!) can help with prioritising tasks, talking about problems as they arise, and finding solutions that work for you.

Finding University Support

Disability Services – Most universities recognise Autism (although may need some educating around PDA!) and provide support services. They may offer:

Extensions on assignments
Adjustments to attendance requirements
Alternative exam conditions (e.g., extra time, separate room)
Note-taking software or a scribe

Accommodations for Anxiety and Overwhelm – Many lectures are now available to view online but if you find attending tutorials in-person causes anxiety you may qualify for:

Attending online
Flexible participation in discussions
Access to quiet study areas
Having a support person with you

Student Support Staff – Some universities offer Autism/PDA support staff, mental health/ counselling services, or Autism specific peer mentoring programs. Connecting early can help you access the right accommodations before challenges build up.

Managing Demand Avoidance in Daily University Life

Use Low-Demand Routines – Start work in a casual way (e.g., reading notes while listening to music) to ease into studying.
Turn Tasks into Games – Race against a timer, create reward systems, or challenge yourself with playful incentives (this won’t work for all PDAers!).
Allow for Spontaneous Work – If energy strikes, go with it! Get ahead when you have the energy so you can afford low-energy days.
Pre-emptive Breaks – If you feel resistance building, take a short break before you hit shutdown mode.
Flexible Socialising – University social life can feel like high-pressure. If you are wanting to build friendships, choose low-demand interactions like online study groups, time limited casual meetups, or interest-based clubs.
Energy Accounting – Learn what takes your energy and gives you energy so that you can ensure you have energy reserves in stores for when you need them (hear from Maja Toudal).

Seeking PDA-Friendly Mental Health Support

Find a PDA-Informed Therapist – University counsellors may not be familiar with PDA, so consider external support if needed. They may also be able to advocate on your behalf if you need atypical accommodations.
Use Online Communities – PDA support groups, forums, and Discord servers may provide validation and shared strategies.
Self-Regulation – by understanding yourself, you can learn what strategies are useful in calming your nervous system when triggered. It may be movement, fidget tools, grounding techniques, or sensory-friendly study spaces to help manage stress.

Self-Compassion for When You Can’t Do the Thing

University life can be demanding, and when time blindness, executive dysfunction, or PDA-driven avoidance get in the way, it’s easy to spiral into frustration or self-criticism. But self-compassion is essential — beating yourself up won’t make the task easier, but kindness might.
Acknowledge the Challenge Without Judgment

Instead of thinking, "I should have been able to do this," try:

"This was genuinely hard for me today, and that’s okay."
"I’m struggling right now, but that doesn’t define my abilities."

Separate Self-Worth from Productivity

Not getting something done doesn’t make you lazy or a failure. It means you’re a human with a nervous system that sometimes struggles with demands. Your value isn’t measured by how much you accomplish in a day.
Reframe ‘Failure’ as Data

Rather than seeing a missed deadline or incomplete task as proof that you can’t succeed, try viewing it as information:

What made this task hard?
Was there too much pressure? Not enough structure?
What small change or type of support could make it more doable next time?
Remind yourself that you don’t need to withdraw from university because you missed one deadline.

Offer Yourself the Same Kindness You’d Give a Friend

If a friend told you they were overwhelmed and couldn’t complete something, would you call them lazy? Probably not. You’d likely say, “That sounds tough—I get why that was hard.” You deserve the same compassion.
Focus on the Next Tiny Step

If a task feels impossible right now, what’s the smallest, lowest pressure step you can take? Sometimes that’s just:

Writing down what needs to be done.
Opening the document.
Setting a reminder to revisit it later.
Explaining to a support person or friend what the task is that needs to be done.

And sometimes, the best step is resting or engaging in your passions without guilt so you can try again when you have more capacity.

University with PDA can be challenging, but it can be possible to complete your studies with the right strategies, support and realistic expectations. Recognising how you work best—and having appropriate accommodations—can make all the difference.