Unmasking PDA Series: Part 2: Making Sense of Needs and Supports

If you’re an adult PDAer, you’ve probably spent a lot of time trying to make sense of yourself in a world that often feels overwhelming, unpredictable, or full of invisible rules. The good news is—you’re not alone, and there can be ways to make life feel more manageable, more yours. Below are some ideas that PDA adults might find helpful because they may support your need for autonomy, reduce daily stress, and help you build a life that actually works for you.

Reframing Demands: Turning tasks into challenges, games, or personal choices can help reduce resistance for some PDAers.
Incorporate Passions and Interests: This isn’t just enjoyable—it can be essential for well-being, motivation, and reducing demand avoidance.

Interest-Based Task Framing: Connect less preferred activities to a strong interest (e.g., listening to a favourite podcast while doing housework or incorporating a creative element into work).
Autonomy in Activities: Avoid rigid schedules and instead create flexible, interest-driven routines that feel engaging rather than imposed.
Gamification & Creative Engagement: Turning tasks into challenges, storytelling, or creative projects can make them feel more inviting and less obligatory.
Safe Exploration of Interests: PDAers may thrive when they can dive into passions without restrictions—giving yourself permission to engage fully can lead to a sense of fulfillment and ease.

Body Doubling: Having another person present while you work can be a helpful strategy. Unlike external pressure or imposed structure, a supportive body double can create a sense of shared presence without adding demands, making tasks feel more approachable. For many, body doubling helps reduce the sense of internal resistance, making tasks feel less overwhelming and more possible to engage with on their own terms. This can look different for everyone:
- Working quietly alongside a friend, partner, or colleague
- Virtual co-working sessions with minimal expectations
- Having someone nearby engaged in their own activity while you tackle a task
- Gentle check-ins that provide accountability without pressure

Different Environment: Knowing you are going to complete a task in a different space of your choosing may help to get it done (e.g., a library, café or writing retreat).
Building Flexibility into Daily Life: Creating a structure that allows for autonomy and spontaneity can reduce overwhelm.
Self-Compassion: Understanding that avoidance does not mean laziness but is a nervous system response – this lens can shift self-blame. In addition, recognising when you are at reduced capacity due to Autistic burnout, heightened stressors or physical conditions (e.g., flare ups of EDS or PCOS).
Notice early signs of overload: If you start feeling irritable or overwhelmed, take a break before full shutdown mode kicks in. Increase informal or formal supports if available and draw upon regulation tools to increase energy.
Finding PDA-Aware Support: Connecting with therapists or communities that understand PDA can be beneficial to adult PDAers as this helps to validate and normalise experiences as well as learn coping techniques.

Finding the Right Work Environment

Self-employment or freelance work – Many PDA adults thrive when they have control over their schedules and workload. Being self-employed in an area of interest, with the ability to delegate tasks outside of interest areas can sometimes work well.
Flexible jobs with autonomy – Roles that allow for independent work and minimal micromanagement are often a good fit.
Remote work options – Working from home can reduce stress and increase productivity for some PDAers.

Workplace Accommodations That Help

Deciding whether to disclose your PDA profile at work is a personal choice. For some, it can open the door to understanding and accommodations; for others, it might feel too risky or vulnerable. There’s no right answer—only what feels safe and useful for you. If you do choose to disclose, it can help to think about what you want to share, how much detail feels right, and who might be the most receptive person to start with. Sometimes, having a support person or health professional assist you with this process can help.

If you’re in a traditional job, these adjustments can make work more manageable:

Task flexibility – Having the ability to choose which tasks to work on first can help reduce resistance.
Communication preferences – Written instructions can be easier to process than verbal demands.
Reduced micromanagement – The more autonomy you have, the less likely you are to hit a wall of avoidance.
Sensory-friendly environments – Reducing sensory overload (quiet spaces, noise-cancelling headphones, own workspace) can improve focus and comfort.
Administration support – If possible, have someone that you can delegate tasks to that feel more demanding and laborious (less within your interest area or skill set).

Asking for support at work is valid—and so is needing guidance on how to start that conversation. If your employer is open to accommodations, you might explore ways to adjust expectations, so they align better with your working style. At The Kidd Clinic, we also offer workplace training and tailored recommendations for employers supporting neurodivergent team members.